a) a cell phone
b) a belt
c) your basic, everyday underwire bra
d) all of the above
Read the following story, and see if you can determine what the answer is for my experience in the SLC airport earlier this week.
So, the security line was incredibly long and to top it off, this poor mother in front of me was struggling to hold on to her big 10 month of baby boy while getting all of her stuff ready to go through the x-ray machine. I quickly got (almost all) my stuff into bins and offered to help her. She sighed a sigh of relief and asked me to hold her son. Well, I was more than thrilled to hold a baby since it had been a couple hours since I had held Austin and Isaac and I was already going through withdraws. In the excitement of it all, I forgot to take my cell phone out of my pocket, which became apparent to me the minute I sounded off the metal detector. I had to go back through, put my phone on the conveyor belt and try it again. Then, I remembered I still had my belt on when I, once again, set the alarm off. That also had to go through the conveyor belt, but at that point I had apparently already broken the two, not three strikes you're out rule. So I got sent to the side where all the other potential terrorists have to wait their turn for a pat down.
A woman finally came over to get me, had me point out, without touching, my stuff (she was very adamant that I NOT touch my belongings as she collected them), and then escorted me over to my own little private, plastic windowed booth. I first had to sit down and lift my bare feet up one at a time so she could inspect the soles of my feet. Once she discovered that I was not concealing weapons on the bottom of my bare feet, I got to move on to the more exciting portion of the inspection... the wand! She very carefully and thoroughly explained to me that when I heard this sound, beeeeeeeeeeeeep, she would have to pause the scanning and pat me down in that area. Well, I beeped on both sides of my head (earrings and bobby pins), my mid-back (bra clasp), and my chest (underwire bra, right?). She had to further inspect each of those areas... for my chest, she basically took the side of her hand and followed along the underwire of the bra from my cleavage (I know, stop laughing, I don't have cleavage) out toward my side. I thought it would be a rather simple procedure, but she apparently didn't like the thickness, width, I don't know what, of my underwire bra and asked me multiple times, "Are you sure there's nothing else in there?" Nope. Just a bra. Anyway, she inspected my chest like 3 times (nothing was inappropriate), just so unsure of something. I was just about to offer to take my bra off for her when she finally let me go.
So, what's the answer to the Airport Security Quiz? I guess d) all of the above... kind of? If I would have remembered to take out my phone and belt, there's no way I would have had to go through that "process". Take a lesson from me, ladies... get every piece of metal off and in on the conveyor belt!
It's unfortunate why I had to be so thoroughly inspected anyway. 9/11 sure did change our lives!
10 comments:
wow! and I don't know what else to say, airport security can be rough. anyway found your blog through suzanna's. those babies are so cute, looked like fun, almost makes me want another one... someday. -keely
www.lornekeely.wordpress.com
Yikes! Can't say my underwire has ever set off airport security. That's odd. But beware if you have one on when you are near an MRI machine, it begins to lift off and toward the giant magnet.
That's hilarious, Sarah. I almost want to stand by an MRI just to feel the lift off!
Rebecca-I just googled your name yesterday trying to find some internet scoop about you. Then, today, Keely sent me a link to your blog. On a side note, I will pay you $10 to remove your bra at security the next time you fly. $10. Think about it.-sarameg
Um, that is awesome. I thank you for this in-depth and detailed description and the reenactment you gave me in person.
All I have to say is, protect the ladies as best you can... Sarah, your comment cracked me up! I love it.
So did I tell you about the time the white elephants took their bras through security on a flag pole?!?! tee hee Mom
Nothing like a little public humiliation to keep life interesting. I think I would have died a little if some strange woman run her hand around the under wire of my bra. At least you have an amusing blog post out of the whole ordeal.
I also have a love/hate relationship with airport security. I really do appreaciate what they are doing but...I once had my entire suitcase searched at security while flying from Burbank to Oakland by myself. They removed everything (including my special chonies) one by one in the middle of the airport and even took my hair dryer over to an electrical outlet, plugged it in, and turned it on. It was pretty annoying. And then they pulled me aside just before I boarded the plane to "wand" me again and pat me down. I guess I look like a terrorist. Jeff thinks it was the one way ticket that did it.
Loved your story. There is nothing like getting felt up at the airport for no reason.
Okay, Rebecca you have a great way of telling stories. I love this post. And the whole MRI lift off thing is cracking me up.
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